Three years and hospitals still refuse to adjust
If you’ve mustered the nerve to take a gander at the press these days, particularly the nearly pointless Chicago Tribune, then you’ve been seeing the same old tired late fall/early winter warnings:
- The coronavirus JN.1 subvariant is becoming the dominant strain and it’s a bit better at evading the typical antibodies and vaccines.
- It might be time to start wearing masks at medical facilities again.
- The same triple threat of RSV, the flu and the newest COVID iteration is starting to put a strain on our hospitals so you need to get vaccinated.
As to number one, what a shock! A disease continues to evolve into a less lethal, more contagious, and smarter version? If only human beings could do something like that.
My thoughts on number two are, as long as they’re passing out surgical masks, we should wear them at health care centers during the winter months because that’s when all of the infected people descend upon them and no one needs to catch your version of the plague because you can’t be bothered to cover your mouth when you cough.
Meanwhile, a great deal of number three is patently pointless because anyone who hasn’t gotten vaccinated at this late point isn’t about to do so out of a misguided adherence to petty partisan politics. So, why bother wasting your breath?
But that declaration belies a much greater issue that hospitals want you to completely ignore or overlook. Those money-grubbing motherfuckers have had three long years to adjust to the new flu season realities, but they refuse to increase their capacity because that would mean cutting into their elective surgery and endless outpatient cancer treatment goldmine.
And that’s been the case since 2019.
We’re expected to adjust our lives to protect those hypocritical medical centers’ massive profit margins which, in the case of Delnor Hospital in Geneva, Illinois, regularly reaches the 200 percent mark. And those full-of-shit administrators firmly believe they hold the moral imperative in this regard.
Since there’s no real value in curing sick people, they refuse to add the requisite beds required to adjust to the post-pandemic reality. Of course, as if on cue, all of the pandering politicians jump on the bandwagon to support these institutions who only have their own interest in mind.
Meanwhile, everyone’s terrified of national health care which would be ten massive steps above the bullshit for-profit medical paradigm we currently have to endure.
At least you have me to keep them on the straight and narrow.
Who knows? They might just rub you the right way!
There aren’t many benefits to this gig, but developing the kind of spy network that provides eyes and ears everywhere can be a lot of fun. I still fondly remember when then-county chairman Karen McConnaughay presided over an executive session admonishing board members not to reveal the contents of executive sessions to me. And I heard about it ten minutes after they’d adjourned.
So, I was particularly amused when one of my favorite sources noted that Best Asian Massage recently opened at 410 East State Street (Route 38) in my staid hometown of Geneva, Illinois. From the looks of the women prominently posted in their Web ads (since removed), there must be a dire clothing shortage in Japan, too.
Perhaps someone should start a crowdfunding campaign.
Worse yet, the poor darlings seem to harbor a rather odd propensity to buy brassieres about three sizes too small. Perhaps it’s the result of some sort of inches to centimeter conversion misinterpretation.
Being the upstanding and concerned citizen you’ve come to know and love, I felt obligated to report this fascinating development to mayor Kevin Burns, city manager Stephanie Dawkins, and the entire city council.
I’ll swear on a stack of bibles that I took absolutely no joy in pointing out that I’d uncovered this heinous attempt to corrupt the morally upright men of Geneva long before they did. If you recall, they’re far too busy trying to get folks not to mow their lawns. Though if my source was correct, by the /amount of traffic entering and exiting the building, there were quite a few “upright” Geneva men already involved.
But alas! Someone has to rain on these kinds of parades and it may as well be me. After a brief email to GPD Chief Eric Passarelli, “a man who looked like a cop” paid them a visit shortly thereafter and the foot traffic summarily plummeted by 95 percent.
Ah well! Now those poor young women will never be able to afford a bra that fits.
Since I’ve forgotten more than most of you bleeps will ever know about home rule vs. non-home rule communities, I turned to city manager Dawkins to determine whether this, or any proposed Geneva business, had to go through the city council before opening. But instead of an answer, I got a screed about how bleeps like me are the reason Geneva isn’t a home rule community which would give them the power to control this kind of thing.
Well, she didn’t actually use the word “bleep,” but she was thinking it!
It took the Chief to explain that, because Geneva isn’t home rule, there’s nothing they can do to prevent these businesses from coming into the city. And once they do open, the City has to rely on the State to enforce the professional standards required of all Illinois massage business. If they catch a “masseuse” in “the act,” they can temporarily shut them down for prostitution, but most of these rub and tug joints are savvy to that possibility.
My understanding is the “investigation” is ongoing and I’m convinced the mayor is leading that charge without any regard for his own personal safety.
Though come to think of it, I’m wondering if our progressive city council might just let Best Asian Massage slide – figuratively, of course. They do employ minority women, after all.
When it comes to Smithfield, it might literally be a gift horse
To much public fanfare, Smithfield, St. Charles, Illinois,’ largest employer, and a concern we’ve recently covered, just donated 16.25 tons of pork “protein” to the Northern Illinois Food Bank.
Now, you know I’m not one to be cynical, particularly around the holidays, but were I the fine folks at the NIFB, the first thing I’d do is run a magnet over every last ounce of that “meat.” Though that won’t catch all the wood chips from the pallets now, will it? Then I’d subject it to a power washer because, when it comes to Smithfield, you never know where it’s been.
And pork “protein?” That remarkably appetizing term sounds a lot like something that might be the main ingredient in your garden variety “I don’t really want to know how it’s made” sausage.
Upon further investigation, which consisted of reading a few more paragraphs down in the article, the cuts involved are pork shanks, more colloquially known as “pig’s knuckles.” In the hands of an expert chef it can be quite tasty, but your average cook won’t begin to know how to deal with their muscular toughness.
Let’s just say it’s such a poorly regarded cut of meat that neither Meijer nor Jewel will sell it.
If Smithfield could’ve sold that “meat” for a greater profit than the tax write off for “donating” it, that’s exactly what they would’ve done. They’re still one of the worst companies and corporate citizens on the planet.
