Sorry losers and haters, but my I.Q. is one of the highest – and you all know it! Please don’t feel so stupid or insecure, it’s not your fault. – Donald Trump
The Kane County Chronicle has published three – count ‘em – three separate articles on KC GOP Chairman Andro Lerario’s hilariously bumbling quest to organize a pro-Trump caravan in western Kane County. Ah well. What do you expect from a “newspaper” where 90 percent of the content is police reports and real estate transactions.
Though what does it say about a journalist who covers that publication’s propensity to write three separate columns on a silly non-story? In my defense, the whole thing is rather humorous, it’s emblematic of a Party’s plunge into oblivion, and unlike the Chronicle, my columns tend to have a point.
So, why is Brenda Schory suddenly covering all things Republican? Oh, that’s easy! One of my inside KC GOP sources noted that Schory and Lerario “talk every day.” Brenda is so desperate for any form of positive (male) attention that she’s signed on to be his lapdog, which is pretty much par for the Shaw Media case.
And Lerario fervently believes that if he adequately schmoozes Schory, she’ll write whatever he wants, which has pretty much been the case so far. You see, Andro is similarly convinced that a couple of well-placed Chronicle articles are all it will take to snatch a November victory from the jaws of a now inevitable major defeat. The biggest hitch in his giddyup, of course, is that no one reads the Kane County Chronicle.
But what do you expect from a man who thinks a Trump caravan is the epitome of local campaigning? And to do so in the heart of Kane and McHenry county Republican-dom? Talk about preaching to the choir. It certainly won’t change the fact that, after Agent Orange lost the still-GOP Kane County by 4 points in 2016, and an embarrassing 14 points in 2020, his numbers will be even worse this year.
Aside from the futility of the “parade” itself, what did that pointless paper and reporter cover? Lerario’s processional parking lot problems! I kid you not.
Failing to understand the most basic elements of Political Ethics 101, snowflake Lerario ran to tattle to mommy Brenda about how that bad Campton Hills Township Highway Commissioner, Sam Gallucci, refused to let that group use their parking lot as a starting point. Schory somehow failed to note that it’s against the law to use government-owned property for partisan political purposes, so Gallucci had no choice but to shut Lerario down.
Rebuffed, Lerario set his sights on the Lily Lake Elementary School parking lot without asking the District for permission, either. His hypothesis was:
Who cares who owns the parking lot? It’s a meeting place to get together and meet and go up Route 47. It’s 30 minutes, and then we leave. If this was Parading for Kamala, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. You know it, and I know it.
Oh! The hardships poor little Andy has to endure!
“Who cares who owns the parking lot?” If ownership is immaterial, then I’m going to start advertising rooms at the Lerario residence on Airbnb at surprisingly low rates. And perhaps the school doesn’t want a bunch of MAGA misfits making it appear as if they’re supporting one candidate over the other. School districts have to walk a very fine line in these hyper-partisan times.
Let’s not forget the legal liability issues, either. If one of those numbskulls damaged their cars on school property they’d be the first ones to sue the District. But despite failing to get the go ahead, Lerario’s group used the school parking lot anyway because MAGA Republicans are never wrong about anything.
Years ago, when I was looking for a place to ride the road bike west from LaFox, I called the fine folks at Lord of Life Church at LaFox Road and Route 38 to seek permission to use their parking lot. They appreciated that simple gesture, and after they gave me the nod, I dropped off a $30 “parking fee” donation. It’s called common courtesy, a prospect that consistently baffles today’s Republicans – unless they’re denied it and then they scream bloody murder.
But no! Instead of taking the scant ten minutes to secure the school district’s assent, Lerario’s theory, “Fuck that shit. I’ll do what I want,” only makes the KC GOP appear even smaller and more petty than they already are. It does nothing to engage those critical Kane County swing voters, a necessity for his candidates to prevail in November.
As for the blowhard nitwit’s “Parading for Kamala” contention, the first thing I think of whenever I think of staunch Democratic bastions is Campton Hills and western Kane County. And no, the answer would not have been different because, as previously noted, the law is the law regardless of the candidate involved.
I’m truly tempted to say that neither the Chronicle nor the KC Republicans could possibly sink any lower, but we both know the second I uttered those words they’d issue a swift “Hold my beer!” I’m sure they’re both conspiring on the specific means to hit new lows as we speak.
The fact that the once-proud KC GOP has shot straight past embarrassment and directly into laughingstock rests squarely at Treasurer Chris Lauzen’s feet. Having remade the party in his scowling, snarling, and spitting image by installing the lunatic Lerario as chairman, it’s become a shadow of what it once was. And just like Nero, Lauzen simply sits back and laugh as the party burns.
I’ll be surprised if there’s a single Republican left standing on November 6.
Of course, then they’ll blame Republican County Clerk Jack Cunningham for “stealing” another election. If this scenario wasn’t so sad, it would be flippin’ hilarious.
So, to the ten people who still subscribe, please put the Chronicle out of our misery by canceling your subscription. To the voters of Kane County, please put the current iteration of the KC GOP out of our misery by voting Democratic. They’re far from perfect, but they’re head and shoulders above Lerario’s MAGA losers.
