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February 10, 2016 / jeffnward

Quick Hits – February 10, 2016

Ya gotta giv the Guv credit…

… For his willingness to meet one-on-one with the President. And I most certainly hope that beer summit comes to pass because that’s the way all politicians should behave. You don’t have to agree about everything to get along.

And they do have one thing in common! Our two head honchos could easily compare notes on what it’s like to face an obstructive and unyielding legislature.

Rauner 4Sadly, the majority of Illinois Republicans and conservatives are taking the President’s impending Springfield visit rather poorly. Why, they’re shrieking and howling about it even more than Ted Cruz did when he got that wedding invitation from George Takei

And the only folks that manage to make those surly Republicans look good are Rich Miller’s fascinating readers. Holy crap! The only poll they need to take is the one from out of their collective butts.

All this ridiculous outcry reminds me of is how badly parents reacted to the newly elected President’s attempt to address their school children. Indoctrination! They cried! Oh My! How things haven’t changed! Please tell me, after almost eight years, that we’re not still afraid of the black guy.

Of course, if the tables were turned, and Illinois Democrats refused to meet with a conservative President, there would be hell to pay.

So good for Governor Rauner. Perhaps there’s hope yet!


They’re many things, but they’re not Christian!

Wheaton College that is.

Once again, before you hit the post or send button, please consider that I didn’t create that lofty Christian ideal, I simply choose reiterate it every now and then.

For proof of my postulate, please look no further than the Professor Larycia Hawkins saga which appears to be coming to some sort of bizarre conclusion. Again, for those under-a-rock dwellers among us, Professor Hawkins is the one who donned a hijab and declared that Christians and Muslims worship the same God. Basically the same thing Pope Frank said.

Wheaton CollegeTo absolutely no one’s surprise, via confidential agreement, the Professor and College are parting ways. But what is somewhat stunning, is the purported parting apology from Wheaton College Provost Stanton Jones:

I asked Dr. Hawkins for her forgiveness for the ways I contributed to the fracture of our relationship, and to the fracture of Dr. Hawkins’ relationship with the college,” he wrote. “While I acted to exercise my position of oversight of the faculty within the bounds of Wheaton College employment policies and procedures, I apologized for my lack of wisdom and collegiality as I initially approached Dr. Hawkins, and for imposing an administrative leave more precipitously than was necessary.

I guess that part of the legal settlement isn’t confidential! As much as I’d like to believe in the Provost’s supposed sincerity, I’m sure the only reason that statement was issued, was to mitigate the previous blatant due process, racial, gender, academic freedom, confidentiality, and faculty governance violations.

That would be one heck of a lawsuit!.

From the beginning to the end, this Christian College’s only concern was protecting their own butt’s and their vast endowment – nothing more. So while you will certainly get a great education at Wheaton College, it probably won’t be a Christian one.

To quote the great Randy Newman, “It’s money that matters.”


The zoning board of appeals? A mere speed bump!

The last thing I want to see is my beloved Campton Hillians falling from paroxysms of joy directly into the depths of a dire depression. But I fear that’s exactly what’s about to happen.

You see, the Kane County Zoning Board of Appeals just voted down the proposed adjacent-to-Camption-Hills high-end Maxaam LLC rehab center and, by those neighbors’ reaction, you’d think the Cubs had finally won the World Series.

Not so fast my fond hilly friends!

kane countyBecause the County Zoning Board of Appeals is so far from the final say that it’s like going nuts over you’re your NFL wildcard win. C’mon! There are still four games to go!

It’s in that same vain that this issue now moves to the County Development Committee, then to the Executive Committee, and finally to the full board. And like Larry and I explained on Left, Right, and You, the County Board knows those fine folks at FHA have no sense of humor and the fines they can levy are no laughing matter.

The board also understands that addiction is a legally defined disability, and to refuse something as simple as a group home on that basis won’t turn out very well for that government entity.

I’d say we’ll see where this one goes, but I think we already know!

 (BTW, former KC Chief Judge Keith Brown and Maxaam LLC CFA Steve Marco will join Left, Right and You on Monday!)

Quick Hits

February 9, 2016 / jeffnward

Quick Hits – February 9, 2016

She’s as cold as ice…

If you were wondering why it’s suddenly so cold outside, without as much as a meteorological degree, I can assure you it’s the result of a rather icy netherworld. And as far as those rare hellish freezes go, this one may well top the record books.

Are you sitting down?

I certainly hope so, because State Senator Karen McConnaughay is about to endorse the man who replaced her. That’s right! The former Chairman is going to openly support Kane County Chairman Chris Lauzen!

I’m so verklempt! Please talk amongst yourselves…

McConnaughayWhat kind of tectonic plate shift could possibly bring this furious dash into the political Twilight Zone to fruition? Political expediency, of course! Given the average voter’s very short memory, the former chairman knows where her electoral bread is buttered and she will gain far more political capital by jumping on Lauzen’s tax levy freeze bandwagon than she will by supporting former friends Mike Kenyon and Ken Shepro.

It’s that simple!

And let me tell you, County Board member Kenyon and Chairman candidate Shepro are not at all amused by this news because Kenyon’s gone “all in” on Shepro, and Shepro was counting on the Queen to put him over the top.

Of course, as I’ve been trying to explain that there’s absolutely no mystery about Ms. McConnaughay all along. Remember the tale of scorpion and the frog? You know, the one in which the scorpion stings his ferry ride mid-river and they both drown?

That one certainly fits here doesn’t it!


A tale of two fundraisers

And it doesn’t get any better for our dynamic duo either!

Last Sunday afternoon, board member Kenyon threw a Shepro for Chairman fundraiser at the Eagles Club in Gilberts. Why, he even went as far as renting their grand ballroom and bragging about bringing in 250 eager cash carrying supporters.


Mike Kenyon

So it must have been somewhat sobering when all of eight people showed up – two of which were ineffective County Board member Maggie Auger and husband Ray. In fact, it got so bad that Mike begged adjoining Superbowl party goers to come over and meet his friend Ken, but they politely declined.

This, of course, begs the question, what if you gave a political fundraiser and nobody came? And I’m sure State Senator Jim Oberweis will have no better luck with his Feb. 17 Eaglebrook Country Club shindig.

Meanwhile, the previous Saturday afternoon, the Lauzen gathering at Gilberts’ Cruisin’ Restaurant drew a capacity crowd to the point where parking places were ever rarer than a Shepro attendee.

Delusional politicians can be so much fun!


My family may be crazy, but they’re not that crazy

I truly owe Elgin Mayor Mayor Dave Kaptain a huge debt of gratitude for giving me the head’s up on this one! Apparently, a number of folks were asking him and his lovely wife, Sandy, if I was related to U-46 School Board member Jeanette Ward.

Yikes! At least they didn’t accuse me of being her husband.

WardSo please allow me to dispel this rumor forthwith! Aside from sharing a first initial and last name, I am not related to Ms. Ward in any way, shape, or form. My family may harbor a particularly interesting brand of lunacy, but we don’t begin to approach the special kind of insanity that governs Ms. Ward’s daily life.

To wit, I would advise against saying, “I am a tree,” in front of her anytime soon.

And as our favorite local school board loon basks in the glory of all the responses to her racist Facebook post, I’d like to point out two things:

First, though it’s no excuse, Ms. Ward has no clue as to how she’s being used by a group of peripheral political players who clearly don’t have her best interest in mind.

And second, It’s really sad that the local Tea Party groups have to resort to having a lowly school board member beat people over the head with their “message.” They certainly can’t get anyone elected, can they? Oh! How the movement has fallen!

Quick Hits

February 8, 2016 / jeffnward

Quick Hits – February 8, 2016

Yes Virginia! She really is a bigot

One of the things I love about being a columnist is when a subject goes out of their way to prove my point.

JWardu46And let me tell you! U-46 School Board member Jeannette Ward did not disappoint me. In fact, I’d thank her for proving my bigot theory, but it has nothing to do with me. A bigot can’t wait for the next opportunity to prove they’re a bigot because it’s the nature of prejudice.

This time, the proof came in the form of Ms. Ward’s Black History Month Facebook post. C’mon! What could possibly go wrong with a conservative Caucasian wading in on African-Americans? If some of you white folks are still unsure about it, please allow me to explain:

  1. Unless it’s something like, “Black History Month is a great opportunity to learn about the amazing contributions of African Americans and to understand the insidious nature of institutionalized racism,” just don’t do it! No good could possibly come of sharing any other opinion. It’s kinda like Caucasians using the N word is a really bad idea.
  1. If you are going to wade in on the subject, a white person probably shouldn’t quote Fox News commentator Jason Riley, whose face adjoins the Webster Dictionary definition of “Uncle Tom.” And if Ms. Ward’s, “Don’t blame me, I was just quoting some black guy,” excuse really worked, then this would too, “Hey! When I said Jews suck and murdering scores of your fellow countrymen is OK, it wasn’t me! I was just quoting Hitler and Stalin.”
  1. But the best evidence of Ms. Ward’s vast bigotry is, her assumption that – the man – in the form of white Democrats, are holding every last African-Americans back. Really? I don’t know about you, but the last time I talked to Elgin City Councilman Tish Powell, the late Elgin City Councilman Robert Gilliam, U-46 School Board member Traci Ellis, former U-46 School Board candidate Kai Rush, former EPD Deputy Chief Cecil Smith, Elgin photographer James Harvey, Elgin Township Trustee Robert Johnson, and ECC president Dr. David Sam, they were doing just fine without me.
  1. That said, the fact that Ms. Ward doesn’t seem to realize that many African-Americans have succeeded in no way mitigates the institutionalized racism that continues to plague this county. Look no further than how the police treat white vs. black gunmen or the National Republican Party. In the 100 yard dash of life, white men start at the 75 yard line, white women start at the 50. Black men start 50 yards behind the starting line and black women begin 75 yards back.
  1. And despite that massive Caucasian advantage, 40 percent of food stamp recipients are white while just 26 percent are black. I can’t wait for Ms. Ward to address all those Caucasian slackers.

So yes Virginia! Ms. Ward is a bigot. And so is the rest of the Tea Party.


Actually, the sky is falling this time.

Please let me open this particular piece by adhering to the old adage, “If you can’t say something nice about someone, don’t say anything at all.” So here’s what I have to say about Courier-News reporters Janelle Walker and Mike Danahey….

towerBut that caveat won’t prevent me from taking on their most recent thoughts (or lack of them) on the Elgin Tower Building. Apparently it was a slow Elgin news week because, not only did Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum lambaste the City of Elgin for that falling sky, but they claimed the City was lackadaisical in their efforts to move the Tower Building project along.

Goddam Elgin City Council!

Why, they claimed those falling Tower Building façade chunks were a greater danger to Elginians than a nefarious North Korean nuclear device. Of course, they utterly failed to mention that the City installed a fence around the structure that has prevented any untoward injury.

And when they did finally mention the fence, it was in regard to how that dastardly barrier was destroying Elgin businesses on a daily basis. That kind of round robin argument, in which no one can possibly win, is reminiscent of Abbot and Costello.

But that’s not all! Apparently our dynamic duo got all those local business to declare that the consarned City of Elgin should’ve moved this bleepin’ along. But they barely mentioned the fact that it was the Muscarello’s insistent and continuing lawsuits that delayed it.

Only the Courier-News, with its 2,200 Sunday subscribers, could take the most recent positive Elgin development and turn it into a Lemony Snicket story.

Just go ahead and cancel your subscription to the Courier-News. You’ll be glad you did.


Ya gotta love the Cubs!

While the White Sox fade into utter oblivion, the Cubs just came to some eminently reasonable terms with Cy Young Award winner Jake Arrieta.

cubsYou see, Arrieta wanted a cool $13 million with Theo Epstein was offering a scant $7 .5 mil, but before those player-centric arbitrators could get their hands on it, they settled on $10.7 million.

It may just be just a one-year deal, but considering the number of MLB pitchers who’ve had a breakout season only to fade into obscurity or break down, this contract is perfect. If Jake continues down his primrose pitching path, he’ll get that four-year $88 million deal.

Ah! But if he falls back to his first three season form, the Cubs could avoid a really bad Barry Zito-esque long term deal. To quote Ernie, “The Cubs will be keen in 2016.” That World Series victory is coming folks!

Quick Hits

February 8, 2016 / jeffnward

This is the February 8, 2016 edition of Left, Right and You!


Of course, that Smiling Conservative and I want to thank Kane County Chairman and candidate Chris Lauzen for coming on the show and answering our open ended questions.

As is always our Left, Right and You tradition, we would not only welcome the opposition slate on the show, but any candidate who wants to talk with us. And we’ll use the set of question we’ve been using all along.

Chris and Jeff

Larry will be back on Thursday when we may well discuss, Wheaton College, the Governor’s CPS takeover, and Barack Obama’s Springfield speech. Until then…

February 8, 2016 / jeffnward

Chairman Lauzen visits Left, Right and You!

That’s right! The candidate forums continue with former State Senator and Kane County Chairman Chris Lauzen dropping by to answer our questions.

lauzen 4


If you have a question for the candidate, the Amazing Derek will be happy to take your call (847-931-1410) and pose it directly to the Chairman.

And the only place you get these in-depth candidate interviews is Left, Right and You, Mondays at 9 a.m. and Thursdays at 3 p.m. with the Smiling Conservative, Larry Jones, and me, the Curmudgeonly Liberal, on WRMN AM1410. Please join us!

February 5, 2016 / jeffnward

Quick Hits – February 5, 2016

Sadly, due to circumstances beyond my control, Quick Hits will have be somewhat abbreviated today. But I did see these 4 x 8 yard signs at various Kane County locations:

Three Stooges

As a professional campaign manager, I gotta tell you that I’m not sure if this is a very good campaign strategy!

February 4, 2016 / jeffnward

This is the February 4, 2016 edition of Left, Right and You!


Of course, Larry and I want to thank Illinois Treasurer Michael Frerichs for calling in to  explain his new initiative to bring tech jobs to the State of Illinois. There’s a reason we love this guy!

Not only that but,

  • I will endeavor to reclaim my 80’s Christian chorus memories through scotch
  • Campton Hills (and the County Board) better get smart before they get sued
  • And the Fox River and Countryside Fire Protection District (and Ken Shepro) really oughtta give up the ghost.

Until Monday!

Clown Joker


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